Thank you for writing about this and raising awareness!
We are sorely missing our village, where older and experienced mothers can bring perspective to what is the normal passage into matresence and adjusting to life with a new little one; where physical support is more easily available and allowing for a mental break.
Having a baby changes everything. It's not "going on vacation" and coming right back into what was before.
Let's keep listening to and supporting each other.
It’s wild to me that when people ask if we’re going to have a second child, they 9/10 don’t expect any of these reasons. Unless God defies our prevention, we will not. Pregnancy depression, traumatic near death birth experiences, post partum depression and anxiety, financial stress…I wonder how we can equip others to not only be aware of these issues but also know how to respond to women (and men) who share their reasonings to not have more children?
You’ll have to forgive how fragmented these thoughts are from a phone comment. It is a question I ask myself a lot. I think one step is awareness and another might be teaching the general public more strategies about active listening.
Firstly, thank you so much Alexs for writing about this and bringing awareness to this topic. I agree with you on every word. And yes, mothers too should be held, not just their babies. I remember when my youngest daughter was about 1 years old I went through what I now describe as an identity crisis. I felt that my older, independent, writer self was being erased by motherhood and wifehood. I knew I had to get back to writing and that I would feel much better when I did. My husband dismissed my request to have a little time to myself, reminding me that I was “a mother now.” It almost killed me, but it definitely killed our marriage. What I asked was so little, and so simple, and would have been so easy to provide. Instead, I was shamed for this need. Years later when I wrote about this experience in a fictional piece, an older woman dismissed it by saying “it sounds to me like she was just having postpartum depression”. I honestly don’t think I was. I just needed a little time to write and allowed to be my old self from time to time. But I remember I snapped back at her. “Just” for postpartum depression?? Wasn’t it something that should be taken a little more seriously? anyways, there is so much more I can say about this, and apparently I am… in a book ;) just wanted to thank you for bringing some awareness to this topic!
Thank you for writing about this and raising awareness!
We are sorely missing our village, where older and experienced mothers can bring perspective to what is the normal passage into matresence and adjusting to life with a new little one; where physical support is more easily available and allowing for a mental break.
Having a baby changes everything. It's not "going on vacation" and coming right back into what was before.
Let's keep listening to and supporting each other.
Another interesting and informative read Aleks 😊 Such an important topic.. I will be delving into the website to learn more.. Thank you 💜
It’s wild to me that when people ask if we’re going to have a second child, they 9/10 don’t expect any of these reasons. Unless God defies our prevention, we will not. Pregnancy depression, traumatic near death birth experiences, post partum depression and anxiety, financial stress…I wonder how we can equip others to not only be aware of these issues but also know how to respond to women (and men) who share their reasonings to not have more children?
You’ll have to forgive how fragmented these thoughts are from a phone comment. It is a question I ask myself a lot. I think one step is awareness and another might be teaching the general public more strategies about active listening.
Firstly, thank you so much Alexs for writing about this and bringing awareness to this topic. I agree with you on every word. And yes, mothers too should be held, not just their babies. I remember when my youngest daughter was about 1 years old I went through what I now describe as an identity crisis. I felt that my older, independent, writer self was being erased by motherhood and wifehood. I knew I had to get back to writing and that I would feel much better when I did. My husband dismissed my request to have a little time to myself, reminding me that I was “a mother now.” It almost killed me, but it definitely killed our marriage. What I asked was so little, and so simple, and would have been so easy to provide. Instead, I was shamed for this need. Years later when I wrote about this experience in a fictional piece, an older woman dismissed it by saying “it sounds to me like she was just having postpartum depression”. I honestly don’t think I was. I just needed a little time to write and allowed to be my old self from time to time. But I remember I snapped back at her. “Just” for postpartum depression?? Wasn’t it something that should be taken a little more seriously? anyways, there is so much more I can say about this, and apparently I am… in a book ;) just wanted to thank you for bringing some awareness to this topic!
Thank you Aleks, such an important post!