Another fabulous post, Aleks. I found myself in some comparison lately and I like to think I get better at getting out of it with age but it's easy to get stuck still. This is a wonderful resource for mothers.
And thank you for sharing my article on self-compassion.
As a fellow mum of boys I do not for a second recognise the 40 minutes of peace your friend got but I applaud her for it! If I left mine alone with a pipe cleaner and colander they’d be wearing them as helmets and punching each other on the head 😆
Really helpful and insightful post. I’ve also fallen into the comparison trap and had to give myself a good talking too to pull out of it. I’ve started to recognise when those buttons are pressed and what I can do to avoid it.
Ditto! My boys are wild souls and very creative. Definitely, pipe cleaners and colander would be used for everything else, except their intended purpose. I am glad to hear that you found the post informative and that it helped with some reflection 🩷
You made me laugh! Yes, my boys probably would have worn them as helmets as well, or who knows what else. 40 minutes seems like a long time to be peaceful while somewhat unattended - haha. The years when they are that little are exhausting by nature.
So much of your post resonates with me as well I am keen to try your methods to get out of that trap/feeling rubbish with the kids. They are driving mad today and usually I blame my menstrual cycle but it’s meant to be the good week and they are still pushing my buttons! Deep breaths needed anyway. Thanks for a great post.
Thank you Kylie-Ann, I hope you will find some of the methods useful. I hope that as the week goes by, they settle more. At least that is what I hope with mine 🙈
Beautifully written and very helpful. Loved all your points. I think this can extend beyond motherhood, to many other areas as comparison, guilt and envy are such common human feelings
It can be difficult initially to redirect myself in the moment when I'm feeling these emotions as a Mom --comparing myself into envy... But it's refreshing to see that even expert Moms "practice" at this too!
Hi Cheniece. It is really hard because the whole process is so automatic and evokes a lot of other highly emotive feelings (like envy, guilt, etc.). However, even the retrospective practice is another brick for building a strong foundation for better wellbeing 🩷
Oh this resonates very deeply! I know that comparison monster as well as my own vicious cycle of not feeling like a good enough mother. Thanks for putting it into words so succinctly. What a great resource to return to over and over again!
I really needed to read this today, being caught in a cycle of thoughts since last evening. Thank you! I really found learning about the vicious cycle very helpful and will try to be more aware.
Another fabulous post, Aleks. I found myself in some comparison lately and I like to think I get better at getting out of it with age but it's easy to get stuck still. This is a wonderful resource for mothers.
And thank you for sharing my article on self-compassion.
Thank you Kathryn for a warm feedback! And yes, it is so easy to get stuck in this cycle!
As a fellow mum of boys I do not for a second recognise the 40 minutes of peace your friend got but I applaud her for it! If I left mine alone with a pipe cleaner and colander they’d be wearing them as helmets and punching each other on the head 😆
Really helpful and insightful post. I’ve also fallen into the comparison trap and had to give myself a good talking too to pull out of it. I’ve started to recognise when those buttons are pressed and what I can do to avoid it.
Ditto! My boys are wild souls and very creative. Definitely, pipe cleaners and colander would be used for everything else, except their intended purpose. I am glad to hear that you found the post informative and that it helped with some reflection 🩷
You made me laugh! Yes, my boys probably would have worn them as helmets as well, or who knows what else. 40 minutes seems like a long time to be peaceful while somewhat unattended - haha. The years when they are that little are exhausting by nature.
Thank you for the shoutout Aleks. 🙌🏻❤️
So much of your post resonates with me as well I am keen to try your methods to get out of that trap/feeling rubbish with the kids. They are driving mad today and usually I blame my menstrual cycle but it’s meant to be the good week and they are still pushing my buttons! Deep breaths needed anyway. Thanks for a great post.
Thank you Kylie-Ann, I hope you will find some of the methods useful. I hope that as the week goes by, they settle more. At least that is what I hope with mine 🙈
Thank you for your openness in sharing about the struggles of parenting and comparison. Excellent piece!
Thank you so much for a warm feedback Kay 🩷
Very well put! As a therapist myself, this cycle is all too familiar.
Isn't it just Pandora!🩷
Beautifully written and very helpful. Loved all your points. I think this can extend beyond motherhood, to many other areas as comparison, guilt and envy are such common human feelings
I am glad you have found it helpful, Imola. I completely agree; this concept can be extended to other areas within the motherhood journey!
Within, and outside of motherhood:)
It can be difficult initially to redirect myself in the moment when I'm feeling these emotions as a Mom --comparing myself into envy... But it's refreshing to see that even expert Moms "practice" at this too!
Hi Cheniece. It is really hard because the whole process is so automatic and evokes a lot of other highly emotive feelings (like envy, guilt, etc.). However, even the retrospective practice is another brick for building a strong foundation for better wellbeing 🩷
Oh this resonates very deeply! I know that comparison monster as well as my own vicious cycle of not feeling like a good enough mother. Thanks for putting it into words so succinctly. What a great resource to return to over and over again!
Thank you Christine! 🩷
I really needed to read this today, being caught in a cycle of thoughts since last evening. Thank you! I really found learning about the vicious cycle very helpful and will try to be more aware.
Hi Anu, I am glad to hear that this post found you when you needed it 🩷
Thank you Aleks for the shout out to my article. Much appreciated 🙏 And yes, comparisons are so often our nemesis!
Thank you dr Connop, I found your article really thought-provoking!
A lovely post about overcoming motherhoods comparison trap. Thank you so much for including my post about gratitude here Aleks! 💛
Thank you Kate 🩷